Tuesday, Tuesday

Went to see Dr. Fader this morning.  What a wonderful woman she is.  You know you have a good physician when she walks in and gives you a genuine smile and a hug as a way of greeting.  She should lead the 'beside manner' course for all doctors.

Exam went well, but I need to go get an ultrasound, so she can make sure there are no residual problems left from the cyst removal last year.  I guess I am a bit young to be experiencing peri-menopausal symptoms, but I sure am having them! I'll have to schedule the ultrasound in the next couple of days.  All I have left medically is to go see the bone doc about the arthritis.  Sigh....it sucks to feel your body giving out on you. Although, I continue to feel healthier than I have in years.  Going to the gym 6 days a week has also caused my general well-being to improve tremendously.  I am so proud of myself for really pushing the envelope and not giving up.  I can't believe that 6 weeks ago I was having a hard time keeping up 20 minutes of moderate treadmill, and now, I can go 30 minutes pretty hard-core and feel like I could go longer.  I've also noticed an increase in strength on the machines.  Next Monday I have my last "face to face" and I'll see how my measurements have changed.  The weight isn't dropping as easily as it was, but I can feel/see positive changes in my body.

Spoke to Dan last night.  He's at Ft. Polk.  He sounded really tired.  They haven't done all the 'intake' process yet, so he's not able to leave the base or do much of anything.  He doesn't even have an address yet, which sucks because I can't send him his Christmas presents.  He's hoping to be done with the intake by the first week of January.  I feel a 'change' in him since he left after Thanksgiving, but I'm not sure. I think I'm so sensitive to both the boys, I just don't know.  Jake has completely withdrawn again, so I'm back to the waiting game.  I have to keep reminding myself that he's not 12 anymore.  I understand he's angry, I understand he has issues he needs to deal with, but I also need to realize that he's on his way to being 17, and aside from all the emotional hurdles revolving around me, the divorce, etc. he's also dealing with the standard 17 year old teen emotions and problems.   I guess there will be one of two outcomes; one - he'll come around or two - he won't.  I'm ready for both, and hoping and praying for the first.

It's official, I'm going to England in February.  Need to get my butt in gear and get my passport re-newed, but I leave on the 17th of February and come back on the 26th.  Hoping to see my family at the tail-end of the trip.  I'm really excited about this. :)

Here's a song Paul found today that I really loved: